I’ve become bold in initiating the money conversation. I’m done skirting around the one issue we all navigate – money. Recently, I had coffee with a friend and asked her point blank “what’s your relationship with money?”
“Relationship with money,” she responded. “That’s an odd way to talk about money. I guess I’d say “I’m just not good with money,” she shared between sips of coffee. “I don’t understand investing so I just avoid it. I’m sure I’ll be okay,” she continued.
Bottom line: I was afraid to ask for advice.
Embarrassed to ask. So I didn’t….
I saved. I maxed out my 401K. I thought I was doing everything right but internally I knew I wasn’t doing all I could because I knew I didn’t know money. While I had money in the bank, I dreaded opening up every bill that came in the mail. Why? I could pay my bills. I was raised to avoid money conversations so why would I expect to suddenly embarrass the money topic once I had a job and was on my own?
What I didn’t know at the time was the key to all this money stuff.
I needed to understand my relationship with money – how I view it AND I had to view money management like a skill. I learned to ride a bike. I could learn how to understand money and the financial investing realm. I had to go back and really think about the lessons I was taught about money as I was growing up. Honestly, I wasn’t taught anything besides only buy what you can afford. Never charge anything and bouncing a check is wasting money.
All great advice, however, the topic of money as it relates to life and goals was NEVER mentioned.
Mothers pass on a lot to their children.
My mom passed on her belief that women don’t need to know money. Find a good husband and he’ll take care of it. Yes, my dad did that for our family and continues to do so. At the time my mom taught this, I assumed my mom was right. Yet, I’ve NEVER said this to my daughters. And I won’t. I realized I had to get educated so I could break this generational nonsense and teach my girls how to be strong independent women who earn their money and KNOW where it is going.
It’s time to ask the questions.
It’s time to have the conversations with ourselves, our friends and our daughters.
It’s time to rip off whatever keeps you from knowing your money and learning how to make it work for you!
It’s time. You know your worth. Now know your financial worth and begin building into it and managing it well.